Ooooohh, Saucy!

Day 25. 29,147 words written. 41,675 which should have been. 20,853 words left. 5 days to go.

 I am in considerable pain. It's only almost double what it's taken me 25 days to write. It's not like my pride is backed into a corner and growling ferosciously at me. Breathe son, breathe. Here's to a truly magnificent weekend, stuffed to bursting with broken wrists and caffiene. I can't tell you that I'm surprised. It's a classic Rutter move. I put things off. I assure myself that it will work out. Then I feign compete disbelief at the outcome.

In my defence, I was attacked last night. Now, I've been attacked before, by move obvious things; a three legged cat, my brother, nettles, my mother, a headbutt from a drunk girl. But this, dear reader, was much, much worse. I'll set the scene for you. Myself and my boyfriend were innocently walking in the dark, to what one may call the gymnasium. When out of the blackness arouse a squelch. Something struck my face. Now what, what could have possibly offended the man in the passing car, so much so, that this revenge was necessary. Ladies and Gentleman, we had been sauced. I kid you not. A squeezy bottle of tomato ketchup. Our fellow citizens thought we were bleeding to death. But we survived. Although, to add insult to injury, they got James right in the tash. He was walking around Morely with someone elses ketchup in his tash. I fear for his masculinity.

Now, wish me luck in overcoming my recent trauma, and attempting this impossinble feat. Much love x